But for the past week or two, I have been really bitchy, expressing my thoughts a little too much at work, not been sleeping well at all, and isolating myself quite a bit. With the random mini meltdowns I've been having, I can't say that I've minded my alone time.
Several medical professionals have told me that the depression which I suffer from is termed "situational." Being faced with back to back to back losses in such a short span of time has indeed affected my mental health. I have wondered, however, if all of the trauma awakened something deep inside of me, which had been dormant since . . . well . . . forever. As I don't want to just shrug and use genetics as an excuse for not taking care of my health, I don't want to blame my recent behavior entirely on hormones.
There are times I feel so unbelievably amazing. My days are filled with this organic high, which I know that power walking and now running truly enhances. Over the past few days, I have hit a rough patch, quite reminiscent of the mindset which brought me into that shitty gynecologist's office, who had the balls to misdiagnose me with pre-menopause. And as I've mentioned a bunch of times, my new kick ass amazing gynecologist is able to view me as an entire painting. Yes, my body is going through some changes. But I absolutely love that my new source of comfort are my running shoes instead of cheese doodles, Ben & Jerry's and the remote.
No comments:
Post a Comment